Are You Being Stalked?

As many as one in 14 women is a victim of stalking, and a whopping 3.4 million people reported being stalked during a 12-month period between 2005 and 2006. With overwhelming statistics like that, it's likely that you or someone you know will be stalked during your life. It's important to learn the characteristics of stalkers and their habits to head it off before it becomes a problem. A 2008 Department of Justice study found that 75 percent of stalking victims knew their offenders, whether they were former intimate partners (22 percent) or acquaintances like friends or neighbors. Only about one in 10 did not know her stalker.  Phone calls are stalkers' preferred method of contact. Unwanted calls happen in 66 percent of stalking cases, and cyberstalking is a growing problem, particularly among high school and college-aged young adults. When a person shows up repeatedly in places where their presence is more than a coincidence, then he or she may be a stalker. Stalkers like to put their victims in vulnerable situations so that they have to "rely" on the offenders. Be wary if you have car trouble out of the blue or a flat tire with no visible damage.
A stalker might show up to be your knight in shining armor and "help." Don't accept it. Let him know a tow truck, AAA or a friend is already on the way. Be firm and unafraid to be construed as a "bitch." Better a bitch than harmed by a stalker. A non-stalker will accept your explanation and move on; a stalker might get visibly angry. Making you feel embarrassed, vulnerable or isolated are the goals of a stalker. He might send inappropriate gifts to your workplace to ensure that you become embarrassed in front of your peers. Or he could spread nasty rumors about you and pit friends against you. Fight the lies being spread and come clean with the truth, if any, immediately. Finally, threats of violence are intolerable. Contact police as early as possible if you're being stalked – keep contacting them with every incident so that they'll be forced to pay attention.