Sex After Baby: Getting Back Down to Business

If you've just had a baby, then sex probably isn't the first thought on your mind. In fact, it's probably not even on your list of things to do anytime in the near future. But for your partner, when you can resume having sex may be at the forefront of his mind. There are two things to consider before jumping back into the sack for intercourse, and those are your emotional and physical states. Many new moms report feelings of being "touched out" or feeling drained of emotion after pouring so much into the new baby. As the emotional bond between a new mother and baby forms, it may seem too intense to include any other form of intimacy. Plus, you may be feeling more haggard and less hot mama at this point. Ease back into intimacy carefully - start with kissing and hugging to rekindle the spark you felt for each other pre-baby. Enjoy your own "sexy" moments, whether it's enjoying the feeling of a bath, having a little fantasy about a TV character or anything else that makes you feel "hot." Give yourself time to start feeling like "yourself" again. Physically, you might find that you need more time than you thought to heal after giving birth.
The six-week checkup is usually when women are given the go-ahead to get it on, but many women feel like six months might work better. If you're ready, there are a few things to keep in mind. First, use birth control - despite popular opinion, breastfeeding is not a failsafe measure to take when preventing another pregnancy. You may be worried about pain, particularly if you tore or had an episiotomy. In this case, it probably is best to wait until you get the green light from the doctor - you wouldn't want to reinjure yourself. It's best to go slowly, and if lubrication is a problem, then add some. It's normal for hormonal fluctuations to affect natural lubrication. Take things slowly and remember that having sex isn't the only way for you and your partner to reconnect post baby.