You’ve just had another argument with your partner, accompanied by that all too familiar sinking feeling: Is this the beginning of the end? And deeper, you wonder if there is such a thing as true romance. You’ve been through a failed relationship already and wonder what more you can do to make love last. Then you read what some “experts” say: romantic passion cannot last -- that it’s just based on hormones in the brain that deplete as the “honeymoon” period, the excitement of a new love, fades away.

When you observe several friends divorcing, or recall your parents’ rocky relationship, you may be tempted to conclude that love is indeed ephemeral. Even if partners stay together, they may not be happy in their relationship or marriage. You ask yourself: Have I been chasing pipe dreams about having a life-long romance? Should I give up on finding “the one” and be content with a series of good beginnings and sad endings?

We answer a resounding no to that question. You can have a warm, loving romantic relationship that grows deeper with time. The secret to lasting romantic passion lies in knowing what makes romance thrive. For some, romance is just infatuation -- falling head over heels for someone based, typically, on one or two desirable qualities such as looks and charm. But these are not enough -- you need to go deeper.