Remember the embarrassment of having to insist your date come in to meet your parents? Or the anticipation of sitting by the phone waiting for a boy to call - then intercepting said call before one of your parents picked up and found a boy on the other end? For today's teens, those days are long gone. You may not have any earthly idea anyone's called your child, let alone that she's accepted a date, unless you check cell phone records or monitor her Facebook or other social networking pages. Most kids date in groups, not one on one, at least at the start of a relationship. This takes the pressure off the individuals while helping to strengthen friendships; however, it leaves the door open for peer pressure to do things the group is doing, like drinking. Have that talk with your child before she's put into the situation. Let her know where you stand on those issues and how to resist peer pressure. Cell phones offer kids a whole new level of privacy when it comes to keeping things from parents. When being picked up, the driver can simply text or call to let your child know he's there. Insist that he come in to fetch your child and meet you. Another way to keep tabs on your child when she's out is to have her call and check in on a land line that you can identify with caller ID and learn her location.
GPS on cell phones is another way to get an idea of whether or not your child is where she said she'd be. Before allowing your child to sign up for MySpace, Facebook or other social media sites, create your own profile and have her "friend" you. Often, kids will post pictures from their cell phones immediately after taking them - this way, you can keep tabs on the night's activities. When it comes to sex, things have also changed. Teens these days sometimes believe oral sex is no big deal or doesn't "count." Nothing could be further from the truth, and it's important to convey this point. If you're not comfortable talking about sex, then direct your teen to another trusted adult or teenhealthfx.com, a Web site that offers frank, sensible advice about being a teenager. Keep tabs on the afternoon hours, when parents aren't home from work, for a time when teens might get together to have sex. Researchers have found that less after-school supervision leads to risky activities. Even if you're not home in the afternoon, try to pop in unexpectedly or have a trusted neighbor do so every once in awhile. Most important, keep the lines of communication open with your teen and know where she is at all times.