Some makeup artists tell their clients not to look at themselves too closely in the mirror. They explain that no one else views us as critically as we view ourselves. No one stares at the blemish on our cheek or the line in our forehead like we do. Instead, they admire the big picture; they admire all of us - "mind, body and spirit.

TWO: Focus on presence, not perfection. Do you remember those girls and guys in high school who were popular but not pretty? Chances are they had presence. Presence is far more attractive to both sexes than physical beauty. After all, physical beauty is relative.

THREE: Accentuate the positive. You can probably name those aspects of yourself that you dislike, but can you name those features about yourself you admire? Maybe you have shiny, healthy hair, or clear, supple skin. Whatever your favorite features are, play them up. Get a manicure or give your hair a deep conditioning treatment. Dress up your self-esteem by taking care of your appearance. Wear clothes that fit and make you feel good about your body.

Speak lovingly and positively to yourself and fight negative mind talk by complimenting yourself. Look for the good and praise it.

FOUR: Befriend your body. Instead of torturing your body by dieting and exercise, pamper it. Get a massage, take a hot bath, go dancing, and indulge in your favorite foods from time to time (it will help prevent binging). Get into your body and enjoy it for the wonderful machine it is.

FIVE: Focus on who you are, not how you look. Acknowledge the whole you and not just your body. What are your talents, gifts and dreams? Think of all the lives you have touched. Create a feel-good box. Find a box or basket (I have a file) and every time someone gives you a compliment write it down on a piece of paper and drop it in. My file includes notes of appreciation as well as gift cards. And when I am feeling blue, I revisit it.