Tantric Sex: Is It for You?

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Much of what most people know about tantric sex is what they've learned in the media - particularly from a one-off by the musician Sting, who commented that he and his wife could have sex for hours in tantric fashion, due to their yoga training. However, what most people don't know is that he and the journalist who recorded those infamous words had been drinking for hours before the comment was made. Twenty-one years later, it's one of those silly rumors he and his wife Trudie Styler have to fend off. But the concept of tantric sex is real. Tantra is an ancient spiritual practice, much like yoga, which teaches that sex and orgasm are enlightenment at its peak and should transcend the sexual experience into daily life. But you don't have to be some Far East yogini to reap the benefits. Basically, the experience boils down to enjoying the experience, relaxing and enjoying your partner. It starts with setting aside an hour or two at first to immerse yourselves in the experience. Later, you can adjust the time as you see fit. Beginning naked is a good idea so as not to interrupt the experience. Keep the room warm, but not too warm, and play soft, relaxing music and light candles if you wish to relax. Tantric sex is unlike regular sex in that there isn't a specific goal or end to the experience. To begin, you might sit cross legged across from your partner on the bed, aligning your breathing and looking into each other's eyes. Sensual massage might follow, keeping the breath in mind as you relax and enjoy each other. The idea is not to rush to orgasm. Maintaining touch all over your bodies is key, not just stimulating the usual erogenous zones. During actual intercourse, pleasure should come in waves, not rise and rise to an inevitable orgasm and finish. As you and your partner feel aroused, back off the sensation for a bit and enjoy it. Keep repeating the process until you both must release - look into each other's eyes and match your breathing to allow the orgasm to engulf your entire bodies. Tantric sex is not for a quickie - be sure to take your time and trust your partner as you enjoy the process.