Making Time

• If you want to have some time to yourself, you have to put it into your schedule. First, take a look at your schedule and figure out if there's anything that can be dropped. While most of the things we do each day are vital to the functioning of the family, sometimes we over-schedule ourselves and take on extraneous tasks. It's not necessary to be Super Mom; it's okay to say "no" every once in a while if you think that taking on yet another commitment will be too much.

• Now look at your day and find a time when you can be alone. For many parents, single and otherwise, this time comes when the kids go to bed. Get your children on a predictable bedtime schedule so that you can look forward to some peace and quiet at around the same time every night. Some single moms prefer the morning for their quiet time. If you're one of these women, set your clock so you have some extra time before the day begins.

• It's also not impossible to have some time to yourself while the kids are still awake. This option isn't really workable if you have babies and toddlers, but if your kids are old enough to entertain themselves safely while you're in a nearby room, you can pull it off. Give them some toys or put on a video and let them know you're going to have some "mom time." Set the stove timer and let them know that when the timer goes off, you'll be ready to join them again.

• Your lunch hour or break time at work can be another time you can have a quiet moment. You might be able to take time to sit quietly, thumb through a magazine, or do a quick meditation.

• Sometimes, you might be able to arrange childcare so that you can have time to yourself. If finances allow, you can hire a sitter from time to time. Grandparents and other relatives might be glad to watch the kids for you as well. If you're lucky enough to get these days off, you might want to use them to take a spa day (whether at a real spa, or using your own treatments at home), visit a library or museum, or have a night out with the girls.