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Getting Him Involved with Childrearing

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One way to get your partner more involved in the childrearing is to make him feel like he has a lot to contribute. It's no secret that guys love to get complimented on their skills and talents, so you may as well use this trait to your advantage. Your partner is probably confident that he can utilize his knowledge and unique abilities in the workplace, but may not realize that he can put them to use in the household. Point out a positive trait of his (his strength and energy, his talent for building) and relate them to something he can do to help with the kids.

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Another way to get him to help is to appeal to his love and affection for the children. Not all men are openly affectionate fathers, and many guys seem genuinely afraid to express a lot of tender feeling, but most men do love their kids fiercely, and want the best for them. If you want your partner to take the kids somewhere on a weekend so you can have some free time, you can frame your request in a way that focuses on the father-child relationship. Rather than saying "get these kids out of here so I can have some time to myself", try saying "It would be great if you and the kids could hang out together at__________. They love spending the day with you."

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As your partner begins to be more involved he'll develop his confidence with these tasks and will probably be more inclined to lend a hand. You'll see a big positive change in the running of your household, the happiness of your kids, and your peace of mind.

Your sex life might get an unexpected boost as well. When you're less stressed and working in harmony with your partner, you might find that you have more time and energy. After a long day of teamwork, when the kids are asleep, you can reward each other for a job well done.